| Dear Keira,
Over breakfast recently, my husband and I realised that we had a scheduling conflict in the coming week. Usually something like this would be a non-event - we would simply resolve the issue and move on. But that was not what happened that day.
That day, I expressed my dismay with more irritation than usual. Then my husband responded with more defensiveness than usual. And before we knew it, the air was rife with tension and I was biting my lip to keep myself from crying. What was going on?
"Our tense breakfast episode turned out to be the red flag I needed to recognise that my fuel tank was empty, and that I needed to put on the brakes and check how I was doing."
The relatively insignificant scheduling conflict was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back for me. Our tense breakfast episode turned out to be the red flag I needed to recognise that my fuel tank was empty, and that I needed to put on the brakes and check how I was doing.
The past couple of months have been particularly gruelling for me in terms of emotional load and people engagement. I had out of town guests and multiple group gatherings on evenings and weekends when I usually recharge and recalibrate for a new week. Recent events in the past few months had also triggered old emotional wounds that needed time and space to be healed - time and space that I have not had.
"Recent events in the past few months had also triggered old emotional wounds that needed time and space to be healed - time and space that I have not had."
I realised that I haven't had a full day of mental, social, physical and emotional rest in more than five weeks - no wonder I was getting irritable! My heart sank when I looked at my calendar and realised that I had another full week ahead - including the weekend. I felt my gut clench and I started feeling breathless. My overcrowded calendar was making me feel suffocated - literally.
"Without [buffers], our capacity to bless others with our full presence and energy will be extinguished, beginning from our own relationship with ourselves and with each other."
It had been a while since I wielded a metaphorical scalpel on my schedule. But I knew it was time. It was time to take a deeper look at my schedule and make changes so that my soul can breathe and love feely again. I had to re-introduce buffer days of solitude and rest by rescheduling some appointments and blocking out dates weeks in advance to ensure that there will be proper sabbath weekends where my husband and I can extend hospitality to ourselves. Without that, our capacity to bless others with our full presence and energy will be extinguished, beginning from our own relationship with ourselves and with each other.
How is YOUR soul faring? How are you doing in body, mind, heart and spirit?
In this issue of Begin Again I wish to highlight a couple of creative resources for restoring your weary mind and soul. I am particularly excited about the launch of SOUL SPA by Anam Cara Ministries because it is an experience created around one purpose - to let you and your inner child rediscover rest and delight in each other and God's delight in you. Don't forget to read till the end and check out Soul Spa and Restore with Clay/Play!
Journeying together with you, |
